During this unprecedented global pandemic, we’re discovering many novel things, not just viruses. How we handle this as employers and employees will shape history. As I write this, we’re being asked to act with integrity and practice social distancing to protect the most vulnerable amongst us. A call to act for the greater good. Gives me goosebumps to think about how hugely impactful this is.
As the entire country prepares to be home for the next few weeks, executive leadership teams need to sit down and make sure they’re putting their people first. It’s not enough to send them home with a desktop monitor and a wireless mouse and expect it to be business as usual. You should really consider what your working parents are going to be juggling and be realistic and flexible about how and when they perform and complete their work over the next few weeks.
Starting tomorrow, my husband and I will be working from home while simultaneously running an in-home preschool for our 5 year old and 3.5 year old. They’re too young to have their days filled by remote learning like many elementary, middle and high schools are doing.
If you find yourself in a similar boat, here are 5 tips that may make this run a little bit more smoothly:
1. Keep Calm & Structure On
Your baby/toddler is likely in a daycare or preschool setting where there is a routine and structure. Prepare a schedule that mirrors that. Ask your school if they can provide insight into how the day is broken out and go from there. Feel free to make adjustments to make it fun and keep it light.
Be sure to check in with your local library and museum memberships. In San Francisco, many of ours are offering free online programming to bring families fun, engaging, learning experiences while the libraries/museums are closed. This is an amazing site and resource: Kidsactivities.com, they offer free coloring pages, activity ideas and a list of educational companies offering free subscriptions due to school closings.
Look at this as an opportunity to make new family traditions. Do a puzzle. Invent a new game. Play freeze dance. I’m planning to make household chores fun! I’ll be getting my kids to help with laundry, dishes, cooking and baking. Yes, ultimately it’ll be more messy in the end – but they’ll be entertained and won’t be whining or screaming (and that’s a W folks!). I’m also going to have lots of arts n’ crafts, a puppet show, do yoga, figure out some cool at home science experiments (Pinterest is a great source of inspiration and ideas).
We don’t normally let our kids have a lot of screen time, but we’re letting go and building some in every day so that we can all stay sane. I try to find shows that have educational components. Some of my faves are Cat in the Hat, Magic School Bus, Dinosaur Train and Molly of Denali.
I won’t be cliche and say “be sure to have lots of wine on hand” but who are we kidding? If I’m writing a listicle, that should have it’s own number assigned to it, but I’ll just slip it in here 🙂
UPDATE: The best laid plans….. After 4 days of sheltering in place, I threw our schedule out with the trash! I was making myself and the kids crazy. We do have some structure in place. I make sure they get dressed every day 🙂 Now our days are structured around our meals and snacks. We’ve layered in FaceTime calls & Google Hangouts with the kids’ friends. We go for a family walk every day (and practice social distancing when we see other folks out for their walk). None of our activities are scheduled anymore. We just do what feels right based on the day and the weather report. We’re all much, much happier this way!!
2. Set Expectations
Keep the lines of communication open with your employer/manager. They may not have children, or children the same age as yours. It simply may not have occurred to them that you won’t be able to make your weekly standing 1:1 at 3pm on Tuesday because 3pm is the witching hour when your kid melts down b/c they’re [INSERT: hungry, tired, bored, sick, a regular toddler!]. Set the stage and talk about realistic expectations given your very real constraints. I’m sure your employer will be flexible and understanding.
Keep in mind that we’re essentially entering into a 7-day work week since we’ve all got to keep our toddlers entertained over the weekend too. This can allow you to get creative with your manager on project deadlines.
3. Divide & Conquer
Two Parent Households:
Sit down and talk about what makes the most sense for you personally and together as a family. It may look like splitting each day up into a couple hour blocks and switching off based on when each parent is most productive. For example, I’m at my best in the morning and my partner is a night owl. We also each need long chunks of time to really focus and concentrate on our work.
Based on our strengths and weaknesses, here’s our plan: We’re going to break up MON-WED-FRI with my husband on morning duty and me on afternoon duty. We’ll come back together at dinner/bath/bed as we always do. I will take kiddo duty all day TUES and SAT and he will take all day THURS and SUN. That way we can each have two days (mostly) to ourselves.
UPDATE: Paul and I have moved to a nightly team meeting where we talk about what the next day looks like for each of us and break up childcare duties accordingly. This flexibility is working a lot better and is more sustainable for us.
Single Parent/Sick Household Member?
Single parent? Or someone in your household gets sick? I’d encourage you to call on your community. Personally, I have over prepared and we are ready and willing to help our community. I can 100% guarantee you that yours will step up if you need it. Don’t be shy, raise your hand up, your safety net will send a substitute in for you.
4. Practice Self Care
Remember above when I said our plan is to each have two days without kiddo duty? I’m planning to use one of those days for self care! It’s really important that we remember to take care of ourselves right now. Being together as a family 24/7, trying to work full time and being without the many resources we normally use to help us get by (instacart, baby sitters etc.) is going to be taxing in and of itself. These next few weeks are going to feel like a grind for many of us – we’re essentially hamsters on a wheel. Carve out time so that you can do you.
Whatever that may look like for you in this new world. Perhaps it’s FaceTiming with a friend, taking a bath, reading a book, giving yourself a mani/pedi, doing a face mask, working out, going on a grocery store run etc.
5. Show Up with Grace
Our children are watching us and taking cues from our reactions. It’s imperative we are gracious role models. Recognize that this may feel scary for them. Speak with them openly and honestly. Ask their thoughts about what’s going on (trust me, they hear everything). This is an excellent opportunity to teach our young ones that we are better together, we must unite in community and support one another. When my children look back at this time, my hope and goal is that it’s not with fear or anxiety, but with fondness and a renewed sense of family and community.
I know it’s hard to avoid the constant news coverage during this time – but remember to tune out now and again and do some karaoke or freeze dance instead! Build a couch fort, make a rocket ship out of an old box. You know, the stuff we did before smartphones and being constantly available 24/7. Let’s try to kick it old school, shall we?
Conclusion
This is an historic moment in our lifetime. I thank each of you for doing your part and hunkering down so that we can protect the most vulnerable amongst us.
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About the author: Andrea Sieminski, is Founder and CEO of People First Consulting, LLC, a firm that works with companies to create an equitable, diverse and inclusive culture that will attract top talent and reduce attrition. She combines a deep understanding of what makes people tick together with her legal background to help companies focus on their people so that, together, they can meet and exceed their business goals.
Contact her at [email protected]
